The day Breathe was released massive butterflies partied in my stomach, all day. I’ve already described how scared I was in a previous post. Putting myself out there to be “reviewed” by the world was terrifying. Letting others read my work is still difficult. As a writer, I want people to like me. I want them to like my work, although they aren’t always going to. Confidence isn’t something I have in spades.
Yesterday, I once again learned a valuable lesson from one of my kids. My middle child, Annabelle, is everything I wanted to be growing up. She is so full of life you can’t help but laugh at something she says or does within five minutes of meeting her. Even though she is a chatter box, her teachers always adore her because she keeps them laughing. However, instead of her normal confident self on her first day of school she was quiet. Not only was she starting fifth grade, getting her first locker, and changing classes for the first time she was at a new school. After five years of going to school with the same kids she had to start over. My oldest already knew boys from the new school because of football and my youngest is still too young for it to be a big deal.
Leaving Annabelle there was so incredibly hard. I wanted to tuck her under my arm and run away. She never asked me to stay, or whined or complained. Although I could see the fear in her eyes, she also had the determination there to make this work. Fear wasn’t going to stop her. I was incredibly anxious to hear what she had to say when she opened the car door and jumped inside after school. I asked my oldest how his day was first and he shrugged and said, “Good.” I then asked the baby girl who told me she had a great teacher and made new friends. Finally, I asked Annabelle about her day. She beamed the big bright smile I’m so use to seeing and had missed that morning then put her hands on her hips before answering, “Awesome! I have new friends and nice teachers and of course they all love me. I mean, what’s not to love!”
No one makes her question herself. She knows who she is and she loves herself. That attitude makes life easier and opens doors. If we could all embrace “What’s not to love,” and face our fear with such determination to succeed we’d be meeting our dreams a lot sooner. I can’t wait to see what she accomplishes one day.