As most of you know already, about two weeks ago my first novel, Breathe, was released. What you don’t know is, I had a major breakdown on it’s release date. Literally, I went into a panic. The world would be able to read my words and CRITIQUE them! At different times during the day I swear I had a hard time drawing a deep breath. Emotions in the Glines house were critical. Everyone was so excited….but me. Sure, I’d had articles published in several magazines and newspapers but this was different. I used the “ignore” button on my iPhone all morning. I knew why they were calling and I just couldn’t talk about it. I only answered my best friend’s call. I confessed my traumatic reaction to Breathe being published. Luckily she understood, or either she lied and tried to help me get a grip.
The day wore on and I was still dodging phone calls when my husband announced that we were going out to dinner to celebrate. Honestly I didn’t want to leave the house. The kids excitement over going out to eat (we don’t do this often because three kids at a restaurant is expensive and loud) had me agreeing to go. Forcing a smile we left. This is where I should tell you that explaining to my husband the emotional stress I had been dealing with might have been a good idea. The next thing I know we are pulling up to the golf course club house and my husband is sending me inside to get the “debit card he left earlier.” I took this hook line and sinker. Heading inside aggravated that I had to retrieve it when he was the one that left it there….
SURPRISE! There was a room full of friends and family smiling brightly. Excited faces of the people I had ignored earlier in the day when they had called. Swallowing the panic was rather difficult. However, I managed to even fool my mom, which I can tell you is hard to do.
Bless my husbands heart, I broke down and cried on him that evening when we got home. He was so clueless. He may have even been considering admitting me into a psych ward. The next morning things looked brighter. I finished up the edits on my second YA novel, Existence, and sent it to the acquisitions editor assigned to me. People are reading my book and reviewing it and I am living through it. My skin is thicker than I thought 😉